June 20, 2006

Goodbye, Terrible Twos

filed under: Idle Chatter

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Today is officially Max's last day as a 2-year-old. Sure enough, like clockwork, last Friday he suddenly decreased the amount of his day he spends being a pain in the ass from about 40% to about 8%. Not bad, kid, not bad.

In his honor, I began composing a song this morning. But I've gotten hung up partway through and I'm not entirely satisfied with the results. Maybe some of you can chime in...

(To the tune of Elton John's "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road"):

Goodbye, Terrible Twos
When your attitude was a beaut
Sometimes you were kind of a butthead
But also incredibly cute

Oh Goodbye, Terrible Twos
As a new part of childhood arrives
We made you give up your binkies
And incredibly, you survived

So Goodbye, Terrible Twos
When you learned how to get what you want
Oh...
I hope we can find where less screaming lies
Beyond the terrible two-ooo-ooos
Two-oo-oo-ooo-oooos...

More verses? Anybody? Perj, I'm looking at you...

Posted by rjt at June 20, 2006 11:53 AM
Comments

(To the tune of Elton John's "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road")...here's your first mistake...

Posted by: Peanuthead at June 20, 2006 01:31 PM

So goodbye hetero friends...

Posted by: perj at June 20, 2006 03:58 PM

You guys are my BEST FRIENDS

Posted by: rjt at June 20, 2006 06:51 PM

Problem is, I have it on good authority (several friends whose kids have passed this watershed) that they leave the terrible twos only to enter the fucking threes.

Meanwhile, Keaton, child prodigy that he is (hey, isn't "child prodigy" redundant?), has been acting like a two year old since he was 18 months. And he's still got three months to go before he's two.

And I'm a tad ticked off about having Elton John stuck in my head for the rest of the morning. I remember, decades ago, when if it wasn't Zeppelin, RJ wasn't listening to it. What's the matter, you couldn't think up a lyric to go with the tune of D'yer Mak'er?

Posted by: KG at June 21, 2006 10:25 AM

(sung to D'yer Mak'er)
oh, oh oh oh, oh oh, the tantrums have to go-o, ah oh oh oh
no more toys to throw-oh oh oh oh oh
the potty's coming clo-ooose.

Posted by: perj at June 21, 2006 03:12 PM