Procrastinet

A Sad State of Consumer Affairs

filed under: Stuff you never, ever needed to know

For the last long while, at least a year or maybe more, we've been using whitening tooth paste. Because, well, you're standing there in front of the toothpastes, and some say "Whitening!" and some don't, and you're all like "well god damned if I'm going to take that lame old-skool non-whitening shit when I've got this cutting-edge whitening joint right here."

I happened to take a good look at my teeth last week. In so doing, I noticed that they were whiter than they used to be. Like, WAY whiter. Orders of magnitude whiter. I was flummoxed.

And I realized in that moment that it had never once occurred to me that the stuff might actually work.

Discovering that a product for which I had paid actually did what it purported to do was the most surprising moment of my whole week.

I was buying it. I was using it. I was choosing it over other options. But I NEVER EXPECTED IT TO WORK. And in spite of that presumption of uselessness, I never even considered NOT buying it.

Grab my leash. They've got me trained.

Posted by rjt at April 6, 2005 10:34 AM